Westside Stories Advent Podcast: Mary Kay Payne

This waiting action plan came out of a season where I’d been praying and asking God, “What are we supposed to do next?” The answer wasn’t a roadmap—it was a handful of small, faithful practices I could lean into while I wait.

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Right now, my action plan looks like this: I pray. I pray because my husband and daughter aren’t believers, and I long for them to know the Lord. I also pray for our leaders—that God would give them wisdom and courage to move forward in these uncertain times.

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Another daily practice is something I do with a small group of friends. Every morning, I text them three things I’m grateful for and three things I can’t change. There are so many things outside my control, but naming them helps me release what I can’t carry and pay attention to what God is inviting me into.

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I’m also learning that there are things I can do right now to participate in God’s work. For example, this podcast. I’m pretty introverted, so doing something like this is genuinely hard for me. But I sensed God nudging me, saying, “You’re supposed to do this.” So here I am—doing the thing that makes me want to flop on the floor like a child in a grocery store who’s been told they can’t have a candy bar. That’s honestly how I feel sometimes when God presents something stretching or uncomfortable. But I’m trying to obey anyway.

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A big part of my waiting involves my family. My husband grew up very active in his church and even attended Westside for a long time before stepping away. My daughter is a scientist and does not believe in God. It’s hard for me to talk to them about faith. I often shy away from it because I desperately want to preserve our relationship.

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That’s why one of the most meaningful practices in my morning prayer time is a visualization I learned from Lynn Cook, who learned it from Anne Henegar. Instead of trying to force conversations, I imagine lifting my concerns—the very things I wish I could say—to God. Then I picture God Himself turning toward my husband and daughter, meeting them gently in ways I cannot. That visualization has brought me so much peace.

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Recently, my daughter faced a health issue. She said, “I think the universe is trying to tell me something.” And inside, I wondered, Could this be her first glimpse of a power greater than herself? Maybe even the beginning of an open door.

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In past seasons of waiting, God has given me small signs along the way—but I have to be open enough to notice them. They don’t come as burning bushes. They usually come through a friend, something I read, or even a podcast. So part of my waiting is staying attentive, ready to receive whatever wisdom or encouragement God is trying to send.

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That’s where I am right now—praying, paying attention, and trying to stay open as I wait.

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-Mary Kay Payne